Emotional intelligence is an interpersonal effectiveness that starts with your ability to recognize emotions, understand them, and realize how they affect the people around you. Perceiving, reasoning, understanding, and learning how to manage your emotions are four steps to build up your EQ. Emotional intelligence really ties in to your success at life whether it be work, marriage, or friendships. Generally, studies show that most financial decisions are made from emotional reasons. To be able to recognize and control your emotions so that financial decisions don’t have to be driven by them is to find a balance.
A metaphor that Doug likes to use is mind like water. You throw a pebble in a pond, what does the pond do? It absorbs the pebble, it will ripple and it will eventually go back to being still. You throw a large rock in a pond, what does it do? It makes a splash the pond will ripple and eventually go back to being still. You throw a boulder in a pond, what does it do? It takes a little longer but eventually goes back to being still. Emotional intelligence isn’t about being emotionless it’s about reacting appropriately to whatever situation may come in to your life.
Doug and Tammie go over three principles for you to follow to build up and find a balance with your EQ:
1. Self-awareness
- Self-awareness is an act of self-kindness, knowing how to express your emotions. Raise your emotional intelligence by using present language to help focus more on the present moment. Put your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs on paper.
- Be kind, rewind, don’t be afraid to give yourself the gift of silence and meditation.
2. Self-management
- Self-management is your ability to use awareness of your emotions to stay flexible and in turn positively direct your behavior.
- Practice effective communication between the rational and emotional center of the brain through self-management.
3. Empathy
- Recognize others stressors starts with empathy.
- Understand how others see the world and accept different viewpoints.
- Connect with others be aware and listen carefully to what they are telling you.
If you really want to build up your EQ follow these tips:
- Breathe deeply
- Meditate or focus on self-awareness
- Start planning – life planning, business vision, etc.
- Move – walk, stretch, etc.
- Create wonder look for other view points
- Assess what you can and cannot control
- Appreciate the issue – what can you learn or how can you grow as a result of the challenge
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